> Police were called in to a day-care centre where a three-year old was resisting a rest.

> To write with a broken pencil is pointless. (Oh my......!)

> The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.

> A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

> When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.

> A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.

> A bicycle can't stand alone; it's two tired.

> A will is a dead giveaway.

> A backward poet writes inverse.

> A chicken crossing the road; poultry in motion.

> When she married she got a new name and a dress.

> A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulting in linoleum blown apart.

> If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine!
>
> When he saw her first strands of grey hair, she thought she'd dye.
>
> Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

> Acupuncture; a jab well done.

> A boiled egg is hard to beat.

> Finally, did you hear of the of the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now!

> what about the maniac who escaped and broke into a laundry and ran off--Headlines next day---Nut screws washers and bolts

Enjoy!!!

A Lex

I'll bring the jokes from the Christmas crackers on Tuesday. :-)